Remember the scene where Chevy Chase gets stuck in a roundabout in the movie European Vacation? He’s in there for hours and can’t get out. I know how he feels. I had a Come to Jesus experience with roundabouts last week. Someone Highway Engineer in the North Carolina Department of Transportation has come up with the idea that roundabouts are more efficient than stop signs and stop lights and … [Read more...]
A Cure for Unripe Avocadoes
Avocadoes are healthy, or so they say. One study said that if you eat avocadoes every day of your life, there’s a good chance you will rise from the dead after a couple weeks. I don’t eat avocadoes because they are good for you, I eat them because I like them. The big problem with avocadoes is the ripeness factor. If you decide on an avocado salad for dinner that night and go to the store, the … [Read more...]
Gift Wrapping and the Average Man
Four times a year, an average man is called upon to do something completely foreign, a task at which he is ill equipped. At Mother’s Day, on his Anniversary, at Christmas and on his wife’s birthday, the average man must gift-wrap presents. First, the average man must come up with the proper wrapping paper. Bat Man and Robin gift wrap paper, for example, is not considered appropriate to enclose … [Read more...]
Ear Hair
God has a sense of humor. Afterall, he gave us penguins – which are impossible not to observe and let out a chuckle or at least a smile. He also gave us truly funny people – like Jonathan Winters, Steve Martin, Jack Benny, and Bob Hope. But then, right before the Seventh Day when He rested, God gave old men ear hair. As far as I know, women of any age don’t have tufts of hair follicles … [Read more...]
The Do’s and Don’ts of Hawk Chasing
I had just put a handful of mealworms in the bowl near the bluebird house and stood back to watch the male fly to the feeder and secure a beak full of worms. Suddenly, a hawk swooped over the fence, talons stretched, heading for the bluebird. Fortunately, the hawk missed as the bluebird ducked quickly, but these bluebirds are like my children, only better behaved. Startled and extremely upset, I … [Read more...]
Hey! Back me Up Here!
Sportsmen face many obstacles in their outdoor careers. Driving a Jeep down a muddy, rut-filled logging road deep in a grouse covert comes to mind. But that’s not the most difficult challenge. Stepping squarely on a hornet’s nest while creeping in on a spring gobbler is no walk in the park, but worse can happen. An outdoors type might even find himself or herself between a mother bear and her cubs … [Read more...]
Beware of Gourmet Salted Peanuts
Went through a little place called Waverly not long ago. The peanut capitol of the world, or so they claimed. I had been dunking some bloodworms in the lower Chesapeake for croakers. Decided to come back the scenic route up Route 460 instead of fighting the US Navy getting off work on I-64 at Hampton. I loaded up on the croakers, by the way. Had a cooler full. So, it was back to Charlottesville … [Read more...]
Counting Meal Worms
Having too much time on your hands is not a good thing. For example. I had ordered 5,000 meal worms for my bluebirds and they came in a vented box with a bunch of cardboard to separate the layers. I inspected the contents, and all looked well, except…. How do you know if they really sent you 5,000 mealworms? If they only packed 4,900 that would be a 2 percent shortage and if some fiendish worm … [Read more...]
A Visit to DMV
I am a charter member of the Charlottesville Procrastinator’s Club. We meet next Thursday, but possibly Friday. We’ll see. Anyway, I am an expert at putting things off till the last minute which drives my wife, Nancy, nuts. Last December, and don’t tell my fellow Procrastinators this, I got my registration renewal from DMV and rather than filing it away in my Get Around Tuit box, I did the … [Read more...]
The Norwegian Joy
In our past cruise attempts, we have gone with Norwegian, and we have been very pleased. On our cruises to Hawaii, we sailed aboard the Pride of America, a 920-foot ship that services about 2,200 passengers. The Norwegian Joy dwarfs that liner. This baby would occupy most of the Barracks Road Shopping Center. It’s 1,100 feet long and holds over 4,000 passengers with a crew of 1,821, of which 8 … [Read more...]
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